Body image…

Recently a popular Facebook women’s running group was inundated with women posting pictures of themselves in bikinis, underwear, swim suits etc being loud and proud about their bodies and progress they have made. I don’t closely follow this particular group but to be honest I was wondering what the heck was going on with all these pictures that I didnt really care to see popping up in my news feed. I thought it was a little strange that this group was promoting this but to each its own. Not something I would do but for many people this is how they measure their progress. 
What caught my eye was a non-bathing suit post. It was a post from a woman named Maria (I think) who had commented that these “success stories” were not inspiring her. She mentioned that she had been feeling proud of herself and how strong she was becoming through running. She also noted that seeing the bathing suit pics started to take that pride away from her. She has had multiple C-sections and feels like she will never be able to attain the success that the women posting have had. She was being honest and real. She was not pointing fingers, just expressing how the posts made her feel. I was upset to read this and for the first time ever, I commented on a strangers post in the group. As I scrolled up I could see people relating to her and commenting about surgery etc. This is NOT what this woman needed to read. Surgery is NOT an option for many people. I was upset because she had lost hope. She was feeling proud and let other people’s “success” bring her down. After I left my comment I had read some comments below mine about how these pictures need to stop.

I had a couple people like my comment, heck, I liked my comment. When I went back to the post to see what transpired…It was gone. I then went to the group’s page and saw that the administrators had removed the “negative” posts and were pleading to keep things positive. To be honest, this frustrated me a little because Maria’s post was not negative. Maybe some of the comments that transpired after her post were negative but her post itself was just plain ole honesty. I would think that it would be important for the admins to maybe apologize and ask the negative comments to stop but they deleted the whole post. On a positive note, they did create a photo album for people to post their progress pictures in. Still, the pics continue to come across my feed. I am debating upon leaving the group or just ignore the pics. I really dont want to see the photos, how I look in a bathing suit is not how I measure my progress. I measure my progress with how I am feeling. But that is how I choose to look at my journey, I understand that not everyone feels the same way I do. I respect that.

So, what was my comment to Maria? Well, since it was deleted, I will need to paraphrase…

Maria, please dont compare your journey to other people’s journeys. We all had different starting points. You should continue to be proud about the strength running has given you. I have gone from a size 16/18 to a size 4/6 and would never post a picture of myself in a bathing suit to show my progress. You cant *see* how you feel…

With that said I was wondering if I was being a hypocrite because I had just posted this picture on my Facebook page…

Really what this picture is saying is that when I was bigger I appeared to be happy and really was I miserable on the inside.  It took several years and many, many, ups and downs to get the point that I am at today. I do feel strong on the inside-for the first time ever. Losing weight and finding physical strength definitely added to my ability to find emotional and spiritual strength but seriously, this is the first time ever that I have felt this way. I didn’t feel this good about myself back in high school when I weighed 125. Its the journey, the good and the bad, that has built the happy and strong person I am today.