Today I was feeling a little bogged down mentally and physically. I thought that this was strange since yesterday I was on a big high after my 13+ mile mountain/trail run. Tonight during my pre-run strength training workout I was so frustrated by my physical and mental weaknesses that I broke down crying. It took me a few minutes to snap out of it but of course I did and life went on. I changed into my running shorts and set out for a short recovery run (my legs were feeling a little like lead after yesterdays run). I set off on a slow pace. After dropping off the rent at my landlords I headed out on my typical “easy” run around town. About 1.5 miles in I hit Bridge St hill. This hill used to be a challenging hill for me. Its not a very long hill (but it used to be) and in the grand scheme of things its not all that steep of a hill (however, my mind has been warped by mountain running) but it was there and I threw out a challenge to myself. Do some hill repeats. Okay. How many? 2 or 3. Okay. After the first push up I felt okay. I looped around the bushes on the sidewalk and headed back down the hill and across the bridge for my cool down. Okay, this time push yourself a little faster. Got it. I picked up the pace across the bridge and hit the hill almost at a sprint. Nice. Next time-so I guess I am going to do 3…yes…3. Like I was saying, next time sprint that damn thing. Feel your lungs burn. Hmmm. Okay. (By this time a heavy set man decided to take his drink onto his porch and watch me beat myself up on the hill.) I picked up the pace and was almost at a full sprint as I headed up. Not good enough. Four times?! Yes. Four. Okay. The fourth time was glorious and I felt amazing afterwards. I have a hard time pushing myself, especially as hard I pushed that last time up. I didn’t care who was watching or what anyone thought. I was feeling strong. I needed that hill to remind me that I am strong. I finished my short but sweet run with a smile on my face feeling 110% stronger than I did when I set out that door. Negative thoughts be gone, you do not make me strong.
